that girl...

Jared had a hard time staying in his seat and eating lunch today. He just kept getting up and wandering around.  About half way through he went to the bathroom. I commented to Lydia who was doing a surprisingly good job eating, that maybe I should take Jared's lunch away since he wasn't eating it. She really liked that idea.  I said since he was using the bathroom I wouldn't this time but that I hoped he would settle down and eat. I then went upstairs to grab something. When I came back down (maybe 3 minutes later) I heard Jared say "Lydia ate my chicken nuggets!" I walked to the table  to check it out and there was Jared's plate and each of the 5 chicken nuggets on it had a bite taken out of it! It was so hard to not laugh with Lydia.  I thought it was so funny (and sneaky) that she didn't just eat one, no she took a bite out of each one then left it on his plate.  I asked her if she did it because I had mentioned taking it away and she smiled and just said she was helping me.  She is too much.

Lydia is definitely deep in the "Why" phase as well.  I remember reading an article that talked about one reason behind a child asking why altho time is because it is their attempt to be part of the conversation.  They may not have all the language or understating to contribute to the conversation but they do want to be a part of it thus all the "whys?".  It helps me be more patient answering all her whys. (I still turn the question back on her all the time "Why do YOU think do?" She certainly says some funny things. One common one is "Who do you want to be in that show/book?" After almost every book we read or show we watch she always asks each family member who they want to be from it.  Last night was family movie night and after she asked us who we wanted to be she looked at Mark and said " Can I be a princess Daddy?" Her little voice was just so sweet. She sure keeps us on our toes.

I have tried spending more time with Lydia and Jared each day and her behavior has improved.  We are not back to the pre 3rd birthday level but it has improved. I know its a phase and some days will be better than others but they seem to both really appreciate me making one on one time for each of them. I also read this article this morning that served as a good reminder.  The basic summary is found in this line from it " Praise what you want to raise". I really like the idea of praising behaviors you want to see in you kids.  It said to stop and think about when was the last time you praised your child's behavior instead of correcting it.  I can easily see how tiring it would be to "be good" when all you hear about it your negative behavior. I also really try to be specific in what they are doing when offering praise. Instead of just saying "good job!" I like to expand it. To focus more on what they did well and how they did it the work behind it. It feels much more real. I have also tried to make sure she has some room time or independent play.  I think our routine got too loose for awhile. I wasn't doing very much learning time with her and she wasn't having as much room time.  We just weren't following our normal schedule (I think I was trying to be more loose and let her and Jared just do what they wanted more and it turns out that really doesn't work very well for me or our kids since they are so used to structure) Jared is in preschool 2 days a week and I work M and F all day (and TWTH afternoon) so I was using our T and Th mornings while he was gone to run all our errands and I think it was pretty boring for her. It is just nicer to run errands with one kid instead of three. We will just keep working on a good balance. A lot of it just has to do with having a plan and sticking to it.